Women today (influenced by women yesterday?)

Ever wondered why a woman feels like she has to be Super woman and balance all the aspects of her life after she is married and has children? We set such high expectations for ourselves that we ourselves cannot meet up to (and die trying). When we are not able to meet the un-realistic goals we set………we start feeling guilty……we feel like we have failed our family, children, husband, boss, etc.

I wondered why women feel this way and compared it to how men feel about themselves………well, men don’t take it upon themselves and agonize over the dishes not done, or the bed not made (of course not all fingers are the same). Most men acknowledge that a woman is their equal counterpart but they still do not agonize over household chores like we do.

The real answer may lie in the history of women and how the Women rights movement came into play.

America is considered one the best places for women to live -- in terms of equal opportunities and rights, but it was not always like this. The first Women rights movements sprung about in the 1800’s when women supporting the cause of anti-slavery realized that, their own rights compared to those of the slaves were -- not very different.

Women at that time were not eligible to vote, University education was not open to them, and women could not have her property in her name after marriage (the property was automatically transferred to her husband). The whole theory of Separate spheres existed. The man’s sphere was the outside or public world, and the woman’s sphere was the domestic. But things changed when the idea that women were the custodians of morality came into play. Women started to minister to the poor, teach them, form anti-slavery groups, and started to cross paths with men on Public speaking platforms.

But even much before this era they was a time that women were accused and killed on Witchcraft accusations. The accusations were usually from neighbors and they blamed women who were more often single or windowed, older women with property. These women often bore no children, or had no sons, and if a married women was accused her husband and son and daughters were in danger of getting accused as well. The accusations could range from death or sickness of farm animals or relatives, to natural disasters, to the death of the accused witches child or husband.

The implication here is that society unconsciously contributed to the accusations by eliminating women past their child bearing, productive years. (So now you know why the tradition witch is depicted as an old hag)

Coming back to present day America……yes we do have it better than those women had it, at the eras they lived in……definitely. But have we really come as far as we would like to believe? Physiologically at least?

If we have then why do we torment ourselves -- by trying to be Superwoman just to please everyone else in our lives and not ourselves? When it comes to take our children to the Doctor we never hesitate and take time out no matter how busy we really are, but when was the last time your Doctor sent you a yearly check-up appointment and you actually went?

You decide …..does the ideology of Separate spheres still exist and to what extent? All I have come to the conclusion is that you can never make everyone in your life happy so at least make yourself happy and in order to love someone you have to love yourself first.